03
Mar
10

how to reenact my day so far

Early: Wake up to kiss Mr Moggs goodbye. Lock the door behind him. Go back to sleep.
8:30: Hear the first mewls of Moggs cat outside the bedroom door. Moan and whinge. Pull the duvet over your head. Snuggle up to the hot water bottle (HWB).
8:35: The mewing begins full force along with Moggs cat trying to force his way into the bedroom. Notice his little grunts just before you hear him pressing against the door. Hope that the neighbour upstairs can’t hear the cat. Try to go back to sleep.
8:45: Get out of bed swearing. “Cock” works well here. I don’t know why. It’s one of my favourite swear words. Very vulgar. Open the door as Moggs cat busts in and stretches triumphantly. Ignore him.
8:46: Check for mail. Use the loo. Strip and weigh yourself. Deodorise your pits. Brush your teeth. Get dressed. Make coffee. Ignore Moggs cat.
9:00: Turn on the computer and Radio 4. Ignore Moggs cat.
9:10: Time for another cup of coffee. Trip over Moggs cat as he tries to get your attention. Watch as he runs off and chews the corner of a table.
9:11: Feed Moggs cat.
9:12: Rush outside to grab your recycling bags which have just been delivered. This will be the first time since you moved in that you managed to grab them before someone else picks them up.
9:15-10:00: Listen to a bunch of stuff on the radio whilst checking your email and farm and cafe on Facebook. Read a Wikipedia entry on Patty Smith because she was on the radio reading her book.
10:00: Woman’s Hour. Listen. Drink more coffee. Strip the bed. Air the duvet and pillows outside. Start washing machine with the sheets.
11:00: Start to get hungry. Turn off radio and start a blog post instead.
11:25: Think the blog post is crap. Text your husband.
11:30: Eat some hot dogs.
12 noon: Save a draft of the old blog post. Start a new one.
12:10: Remember you wanted to dust today. Look for the long duster.
12:15: Somehow knock over your potted basil during the search. Set it right.
12:16: Knock over the basil again, this time busting the old thrown pot with 70s drip glaze against the tiles. RIP old 70s pot you’ve had for 15 years. Sweep up the mess.
12:20: Dust
12:30: write some more, pausing to run another rinse on the washer.
12:45: Decide to halter train Moggs cat
13:00: Feel guilty about how weird Moggs cat acts in the halter. Remove it.
13:15: Write some more crap.
13:20: Feel depressed. Ruminate about interpersonal problems whilst you hang laundry.
13:30: Make a silent gratitude list and wonder about forgiveness
13:35: Think about how weird it would be to inherently know how to handle social situations.
13:45: Open up your files on your writing projects. Decide to write a blog post instead. Moggs cat will decide it’s a good time to curl up on your arms.

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1 Response to “how to reenact my day so far”


  1. 1 Jas
    28th Mar 2010 at 19:42

    Hello! Love the blog!

    My wife’s from London, and her father drinks tea around the 10 to 15 cups a day it seems. They were over here in the states for Christmas, brought over his own tea bags! I’m not much of a coffee drinker, and more of an iced tea drinker. I had a few arched eyebrows at me when I mentioned that last time we were across the pond.


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